Wednesday, March 28, 2012

one whole year.

this past week has marked one year since we were here..

for the longest time, I've wanted to write about our time in Romania and I couldn't figure out what to say. so I thought I would wait until the one year mark but it has felt so far away.. and all of the sudden here it is.

how has it been an entire year?

I feel like I still have to ponder the trip when I think about it.. like, there still aren't very many words for it. I can tell you that my heart was changed. I was stretched and molded more into the woman God is making me. I went with the question, 'how could they?' and left with a heartache for the Roma community instead of placing that harsh question of blame over them. abandoning their children.. for some that's all they've ever known and experienced, so how would they know to do any different?

you go expecting to love spending time with the babies, AND YOU DO. oh, do you. but in the back of your mind (for me, at least) you don't want to get so attached that it's hard to come back. but what is so wrong with that? our pastor from Michigan told us to not be afraid of attachment. so I took his advice and came back with attachments that made my heart grow bigger. if there weren't any adoption restrictions I probably would have tried to convince Chad to let me bring a little girl home. the hospital doesn't allow us to post our photos online, so if you're ever with me and want to see her, I will gladly show you a photo of that precious princess.

I also was very drawn to a little boy named Alex. he is blind (or so they say) and had some neurological complications, but he definitely knew when someone was paying attention to him. when I would talk to him he would turn his head right to my face, almost as if he was looking right in my eyes. one of the days that I was hanging out with him I faced him towards the window and told him he would be able to see all of that someday. because I know God can do ANYTHING if we just ask. he is the youngest of nine or ten children, so sometimes he goes back to the hospital for attention and care.

the neat thing about Alex is that I've been able to keep up with him a little bit. our good friend Erin is living in Romania right now and working for Firm Foundations. she was on the trip with us too.

{erin is third from the left, right next to me}

since she has gone back, Alex has been back in the hospital twice. so every time he's there she sends me an update. one time she told me it seemed like he could definitely see some things. maybe not clearly, or know what they are. but he can definitely see some blurbs or something, ha. I love hearing that.

the end of the trip took a crazy turn. as most of you know, my aunt was with us and sometime on the trip she contracted bacterial meningitis. scariest day of my life, I think. scariest few days, actually. you can read what she had to say about it here and here. and her most recent accomplishment here. I am so proud of her! (can I say that about people older than me without it sounding like I'm talking down to them? I always feel weird saying I'm proud of someone older.. I really am though.) the coolest thing about her experience is that God completely, one hundred percent, healed her. in the hospital in France, for the first few days I felt like she wasn't even herself. she was stolen from her body. fast forward a couple weeks and she's on her way home. I still can't even comprehend it all. the most traumatic experience of my life was also the most amazing. God taught me so much during that week Chad and I were stuck in Paris. I've thanked her for getting sick a couple times. she knows my heart on that; I'm not glad she was so sick. I am just extremely thankful that I learned so much from it all. and SOOOOO grateful that God brought her through it. so grateful.

the visiting hours at the hospital were random so after a few days, and when my aunt was aware of what was happening, she told us to do something fun.. we didn't want to, but we were in Paris, so she told us to and we eventually convinced ourselves that it may be good for us to get out. we got to see this.. and so did my parents once they got there..

and many of the other tourist things people do when in Paris. it's still so hard to believe we were able to do the things we did. and see the things we saw. and my parents got to be in a country they never thought they would venture to because so many generous people gave funds for us to be there with my aunt. granted, the circumstances were not ideal.. but they were able to bring her home with them! what a wild and victorious ride.

I had no choice but to trust God during that week. there was physically nothing I could do to make her better. all I could really do is pray. oh did we pray. and God showed us that He was taking care of us all the way down to the tiniest of details. as I look through all of the photos and think about all of the favor we were walking in, I still get emotional. so much favor. every tiny detail. so grateful.

'Is this not the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?
Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter-when you see the naked, to clothe them and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteous One will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard.
Then you will call and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and He will say: Here am I.'
Isaiah 58:6-9.

1 comment:

margie said...

What a crazy, wonderful ride!